Behind the Bread
by timeyougotawatch
Summary: From childhood to the train journey. Who was the lover-boy really? And what happened before the Hunger Games? Short fic about Peeta, includes a confrontation with Gale! COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

_**Author Note: Hi guys, I'm sorry that I suck at writing descriptions for my story but to be fair this is my first! Yup that's right I am a fan fiction newcomer so be nice! I have already written a few chapters so I just have to check them and they will be published as soon as I have finished them. Please review, at the early stages of this story I would love feedback and any points or suggestions you have. Constructive feedback only though please after all I'm doing my best and it's all for you (I'm pretty sure I just quoted something there!) Anyway enjoy and review. **___

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing that is the Hunger Games except for this story.**_

"_I don't know how to say it exactly. Only... I want to die as myself. ... I don't want them to change me in there. Turn me into some kind of monster that I'm not._"

―Peeta Mellark

Chapter 1

I never lie. But if I told you I liked District 12 then I wouldn't be telling the truth. My district was poor and considered unimportant. Nobody lived there, they only survived there, and it was a cruel life when you were half starving all the time.

My name is Peeta Mellark or 'the boy with the bread' and I am a victor of the 74th annual Hunger Games. This is my untold story.

At the age of 5 on my very first day at school I was too shy to go and make friends. Many of them were from the Seam and despised me for being different and having more money, my father introduced me to a few children but none of them were from the Merchants area or were very kind to me. But there was one girl in particular called Katniss who was the nicest to me and showed me around even though it was only a small building. My father had later told me how he loved her mother and how she fell in love with a coal miner instead. It confused me to why she would choose a miner over a baker, but Pa had told me when Mr. Everdeen sang, even the birds stopped to listen. I couldn't imagine a song like that but when Katniss shot her hand up in assembly and started singing, it was only then I understood. Just like the birds, I stopped and let her sweet melody fill my ears, I then realized what my feelings were, and I loved her. I loved Katniss Everdeen. My Pa told me love at such a young age was unheard of and I wouldn't know the feeling for a few years to come but little did he know that 'love' was exactly what I felt.

After that day, I remember how I used to practice what I was going to say to her before school everyday. Stupid things like: "Hello Katniss, Your hair looks nice today." Or "Great weather, did you notice the flock of birds this morning they had such a pretty song." But every time I walked up to her in the schoolyard and tried to say any of my rehearsed mini speeches, I could only ever utter a single "hello…" and look awkward as her warm smile left me speechless like one of those people from the Capitol. An Avox, I believe they were called. I wasn't exactly shy and I could normally talk to girls, but for some reason my feelings for her made it impossible to move my tongue incase I blurted out my something stupid and embarrassing. Although I kept my feelings for Katniss Everdeen a secret, my elder brother somehow found out my feelings which meant that not only did I have to battle my emotions everyday but put up with his endless taunting too. He was only jealous as the only girls his age who were interested in him were missing a few teeth or didn't know how to use a bath. I felt bad for saying that to him, not because it was offensive to him, but because it was cruel to make fun of the people who weren't as lucky as us financially, like Helen Ogust who really didn't know how to use a bath. But it was still true; most of the girls into him really were missing a couple teeth.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author Note: What do you think so far then? I want to pace this story well so I'm not planning on rushing too much as I want to portray a little bit of what his childhood was like and all the bits you don't get to see in the books and films. I don't know how long this will end up but the chapters are a bit short at the moment so I will try to fatten them up a bit for you! I'm sort of excited it has been 30 minutes an my traffic count is already over 20 people! Most are from Canada. So if any of you nice Canadian folk want to leave a review please do. That just rhymed …. Maybe I should stop writing stories and write poetry! Anyway here's the next one, enjoy and review.**

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing that is the Hunger Games except for this story.**_

Chapter 2

When I was 11, I began to help my parents and eldest brother at the bakery. After school I worked late on my shift swapping occasionally with either of my brothers when I got tired or when they felt like being nice to me. I didn't know this then but this was the same day I encountered Katniss and helped restore her hopes in feeding and caring for her small family.

I was put in charge of the small bread oven in the corner. After setting the old timer with the stiff dial, I had sat on a hard stool near the window. It was sunset, my favorite time of the day. The colours in the sky were a soft orange that merged into a deep blue with small dark grey clouds. The clouds spat out a steady fall of rain promising a sunny day tomorrow. I could have stared at the sky and listened to the drumming of the rain against my window for hours but I knew I had my work to do. As I had got up to check on the first batch of bread, I saw her rummaging through trashcans for food only a couple meters away from my window. As if she saw me watching she looked up but didn't notice me as I ducked. Most people thought I was weird and a little bit creepy so her noticing me staring at her for so long would have definitely creeped her out, plus she looked upset and probably didn't want to be caught. Pa told me about girls needing to be alone sometimes and just left to do whatever they were doing, so maybe it was like that for her when she dug around our bins. Maybe I should have creeped her out so she would leave because unfortunately I wasn't the only one to see her. My mother had suddenly started yelling and threatened to beat her while was brandishing a large rolling pin in her direction. I looked away for a moment and remembered how Katniss hadn't been in school lately and I had only found out by delivering bread to the mayor in the middle of him discussing 'what to do about the mine explosion'. Looking back at how angry my mother was and knowing how true her threats were pained me greatly. Katniss' father was one of the many unfortunate miners to perish beneath the ruble of one District 12's notorious mineshafts. Surely my mother could have felt at least a little compassion, as everyone knew that her mother was in shock and it was up to Katniss to fend for her mother and sister.

The worse part was the expression she now had on her face. She had gone from desperate to despairing and after running away from my mother and her large rolling pin, she had sunken underneath a nearby tree letting the tears, I could tell she had been fighting, stream down her beautiful face. The ping of the timer told me the bread had finished in the oven but I had a plan. I defiantly wasn't smart back then but if I didn't have the guts to go and comfort her and sit with her then I would at least do something for once instead of sit back and cower behind the shadows. So I ignored the timer; I was going to burn the bread, I had to help Katniss.

I recovered four of the six loaves but left two so they would be too burnt to sell. My brother had smelt the burning and asked if I needed any help but I refused, convincing him that I would sort it out. Mother had also noticed as she stopped ranting about Katniss and Seam children to give me a harsh beating but I didn't care. My pain was nothing, It was all for Katniss. Mother flung the burnt bread at not failing to tell me how much of an 'idiot' and a 'disappointment' I was and then she told me to dispose of the useless bread to the pigs. But I could only think of how much she needed these right now, far more than the pigs did. I had never disobeyed my mother but this time I had to, my mother and I aren't close and in this situation Katniss is more important to me than her.

I stepped out into the chilly night catching her attention and I tried to say something but as usual I could only manage a sort of sad smile as I tossed her the bread. She caught one but the other fell on the ground and I instantly felt something bad but before I could go and pick it up for her, she grabbed it and briskly walked away back to her home. However this wasn't before she gave me a look I couldn't quite place and whether her expression was disbelief, shock or maybe even gratitude I felt warm knowing that I had helped but anguish as I knew that I should have gone out into the rain and given them to her myself instead of chucking them. What would she think of me? I was faced with so many raging emotions but through it all I still loved her. My feelings hadn't changed towards her even after 6 years.


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors note: Thanks for reading this far and although it is now 11:50pm, no matter how exhausted I am I made sure to finish correcting and editing this next chapter specially for you. Also I might not get to publish the next chapters until late tomorrow as I have volunteering but I will try my best to get some more content up as I'm excited about the next few chapters as the story begins to pick up a little bit more. Please enjoy and review. **

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing that is the Hunger Games except for this story.**_

Chapter 3

I had little sleep that night. I lay awake wishing and regretting over and over. I should have gone out and gave it to her instead of tossing it before her like I thought she was some kind of animal. I even had a small bruise where I had whacked my forehead against my bed from my anger.

The following morning my brother shook me awake before pointing out the heavy dark circles under my eyes from my lack of sleep and told me he would take my shift at the bakery today as I looked like I needed to catch up on my sleep. That is why I loved my brothers they were sometimes moody and annoying but they looked out for me and were always there for me.

When I was younger our parents would constantly argue about everything and it was horrible. I used to run to my room and cry and cover my ears pretending that there was no shouting. My elder brother especially used to sit with my younger brother Sam and I to comfort us and he would say that it was normal for parents to argue and that it would be over soon. When things got really heated between Ma and Pa, he even went down once to tell them to stop bickering or to take it away from the younger ones. Of course Ma had a good go at him for that but since then I've always admired his courage. I bet if he were I, he'd have no trouble talking to Katniss.

So while I got dressed in my loose shirt and, slightly flour coated, trousers I decided that maybe today was the day I acted more like my brother and spoke more to Katniss today then my usual stuttered greeting. It wasn't long until doubt crept in, what if she spoke back to me? Then what would I do?

As I walked out of the bakery and through the merchant section into the Seam, I knew how out of place I looked with my ashy blonde hair, blue eyes and pale skin and my almost clean attire didn't help either. Everyone in District 12 usually had dark hair and olive skin with the exception of my family and Katniss' mum and her sister, Prim.

I looked away quickly as I made eye contact with some of the widows of the miners. They were dull and tired of trying to survive the cruel conditions of Panems' poorest district. I knew they liked me well enough but I still felt like most of them judged me purely on the financial gap between us and I hated myself, knowing how ungrateful I was towards the life that many of those people would never have.

I finally reached my school and at first I didn't see her but as soon as I had thought that she wasn't coming in that day, I noticed her with one single plait instead of her usual two. I walked a few steps forward nearly closing the big gap between us but I didn't speak, as I couldn't think of what to say so I stood there like a brick wall. Like a complete idiot. Again.

She saw me watching her and she looked down, focusing her attention on a yellow dandelion that was on the grass obviously not wanting to make eye contact with me. Then she paused and looked up for a second speaking a soft "Thanks Peeta" and went inside with all the others. For a long while I could only stand there and smile at our short conversation. Peeta, that was my name. She knew my name! My short lived bliss was rudely interrupted when I felt a rough hand pushing me towards the door and an elder boy spoke: "Come on Baker boy don't want to be late for class or drooling all over Katniss now do we?" I turned around and saw the recognizably hard face of Gale whatever-his-name-was. He was two years older than me and like most people did, he thought that just because I lived in the Merchants area I was weak and snotty. "I don't drool over Katniss!" Was all I could come back at him with. He snorted and let out a:

"Sure you don't, your probably drooling over all that food you have back at home."

I knew that he was referring to the fact that I was always stealing glances at her but the comment on how much food I had caught me a little by surprise. "I don't know were you got that idea from but we don't get much more than you do, we have to sell most of the food we make at the bakery and what is left over is barely enough for us all. We are not that much more different than you Gale." I spat out his name and he grabbed the front of my shirt pulling me up a bit to his height. For a second it looked like he was going to hit me but after some time he put me down and stormed off.

Later in class I wasn't feeling the joy I had hoped to achieve from standing up to him. He wasn't the only person to have those opinions about how my family lived and I never let anyone bother me or get to me because I was used to all the hate and anger from others. But I hoped that I had proven to him that I'm not that weak and snotty person they all thought I was as I never wanted my differences to set me too far apart from everyone else. After all we were all from the same old District 12.

So I was definitely not snotty but maybe I was weak, but only when it came to Katniss. She had no idea the affect she had over me but Gale obviously had noticed this, as from then on he was always more nasty towards me than usual. I realized that maybe I wasn't the only one who held feelings for her.

But Gale and I had never once gotten on and were neither friends nor enemies and I only saw him as competition. He may not have been rich but he sure was popular, everyone liked Mr. I-am-such-a-bad-boy. This included Katniss. I noticed that he often went up to speak to her and made her laugh and he always caught my eye as he did so and gave me his gross smirk which I could only respond with a glare. Thankfully he would be leaving school before us so he wouldn't be around her so much. Was I jealous of Gale? No. But there was something about him that told me to be careful with how I acted from then on. Even if my feelings for Katniss were stronger than his own, he was still closer to her than I was and that one fact bothered me the most. I wouldn't let Gale win her over before me, this meant I had to do something to prove how I felt and I had to do it sooner rather than later. But what could I do?

As I was walking back to the bakery and home, I couldn't stop thinking about what Gale had said to me and how he might have feeling for Katniss. He wasn't necessarily directing his comment on food to me personally but more towards the whole of the Merchants section in general.

Everyone knew Gale had strong views on the matter of equality and our district's poor situation but he didn't understand that we all suffered from it. Even the people from the Merchants section can barely scrape through and I felt bad for him, as there was nothing he could really do about it, in fact there is nothing any of us can really do about it other than accept and be grateful for what we have no matter how much or little it is.


	4. Chapter 4

**Authors Note: Ugh … I should probably sleep soon! I'm going to move forward a few years in the next chapter but don't worry! Peeta will fill you in on what you've all missed in this rather long chapter. I don't want to be publishing my chapters really slowly because that gets annoying for you but I have written one more after this one so it might slow down a little bit in order for me to catch up, plus school starts again this Monday hurray? Just bare with me because if you like what your reading so far then your going to like what's coming up soon…**

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing that is the Hunger Games except for this story.**_

Chapter 4

But times had changed and as I was now 16 not twelve anymore, it meant that I was nearly too old to attend school and it also meant that for the past 4 years now I had been put forth in the Reaping bowl as a possible tribute and I couldn't tell you how much that frightens me. I had always watched the Reaping and the Hunger Games each and every year and it was always the same horror over and over again.

How could the Capitol take such pleasure in making twenty-four otherwise innocent people fight to the death in such a despotic way? The games had turned some of the kindest people wild, turning them into scared and angry murderers or wrecks. Nobody who comes out the games is ever the same. It's bad enough to watch and I couldn't even begin to imagine what it would be like to be selected.

However what choice did they have? After all it was either kill or get killed. Each year my brothers and I would secretly discuss what we would do if we were reaped. My answer was always the same: If I were a tribute I wouldn't let them change me, I would die as myself and not as some monster I'm not. I should have counted myself lucky that I was only on a slip in the bowl four times. Some of my old class mates, particularly the ones from the seam, had been entered multiple times in order to get a measly portion of grain and oil for a year otherwise known as Tesserea.

As the son of a baker, I didn't need to give my family these things and I once had to try stopping Sam from getting it so he could give it to his best friend, it was a completely selfless thought that reflected his kindness but if he got selected as tribute I would never live with myself.

The latest word around was that Gale had his name in there 41 … or was it 42 times. Uh, Gale! The truth was even though I had tried to deny it for so long I _was_ madly jealous of him as I had begun to notice that him and Katniss were very close while I was still hardly able to maintain a conversation with her.

I'm not the jealous type, not at all! This was Katniss though so it changed things. I would often noticed them going off Hunting together in the woods behind the high electric fence that was never turned on. They would often return with plenty of game and they would regularly trade in the Hob, which was a sort of underground, illegal market but the peacekeepers would all turn a blind eye, as they were just as hungry as the rest of us.

Even though school was my second priority after working at the bakery, I didn't enjoy attending class as much as I used to. I mean what would the point be? In the future I would certainly have been a baker like my pa and they didn't teach us how to make bread and cakes at school, well not the boys anyway.

But all the other boys would be coal miners or blasters and the girls would be housewives living to care for all the children they couldn't afford. What kind of a life was this? I got so frustrated sometimes about the people of District 12 starving and lonely while on the other side of Panem, the colourful people of the capitol were bathing in luxury and eating exotic foods no one had or will ever see in this miserable place. I was starting to sound like Gale!

But the only upside was that we were all united as one community and everyone knew each other well. The merchants trade was decreasing as conditions got worse, we were only just managing to pull through and this gave a new understanding of our lives to the people of the Seam who had gradually begun to accept us as one of them. We could rely on our friends knowing that we were all the same, all living in the shadow of the capitol. The forgotten district good for nothing except coal, and that was all we were.

I had changed too. I was no longer short and a little rounded boy, I had grown taller, almost at an equal height to Gale. And there was no denying that my strengths had also grown significantly, particularly in my arms from lifting many heavy sacks of flour at the bakery on a regular basis. My hair was the same ashy blonde and my eyes were just as bright but my face was more angular and 'square jawed' as my Ma would say.

These changes had not gone unnoticed, as I started receiving more and more attention from girls and jealous glares from the other boys but I paid no attention to them, I only had eyes for one girl but it was too bad that she didn't pay much attention to me.

As I walked into the schoolyard, as usual Katniss was in a corner speaking to Gale who had previously left school, as he was 18. He could actually speak to her and she was laughing in her musical voice. I wish I could've made her laugh that way or at least smile like he made her. When I was younger I had promised myself to prove how I felt about her but I never actually did.

There was one time when I almost did but Gale stopped me by being the annoying Pratt that he was. I reflected back to what had happened that day.

It was almost two years ago when I had found out that Katniss was going to take a second supply of Tesserea, which meant another slip with her name on it. I was going to go speak to her and to offer her a share under my name instead of hers, an idea I got from my brother, as I didn't want her chances of being chosen any higher than they already were.

I knew she would have just got back from hunting and gone to the Hob to trade. I had been there a few times with my father to get vegetables so I found my way there without too much difficulty. As soon as I saw the entrance I also noticed her a couple stalls back examining what looked like a shiny pin. I didn't see much more as a figure stepped in front of me blocking my way.

"What are you doing here Baker boy?" Gale sneered at me coming right up to my face after sizing me up. I would have loved to stay and chat but I had more important things on my mind, like katniss. No wanting to push Gale I took a slight step back and simply replied, "Move out of my way, Gale." I tried to step around him but he moved blocking my way yet again.

"No daddy so your not here to get vegetables, and I don't see any items for trading in your hands so what are you doing here?" Gale was beginning to get on my nerves but I wouldn't let it show.

"Move Gale, I need to speak to…"

"Katniss?" He interrupted starting to grin. "Who says she wants to speak with you?"

"Since when did you dictate who can and can't see her?" I retorted, I noticed Gale's eyes flash dangerously but I stood my ground. "Move, Gale." I repeated and stepped forward again but this time I was not expecting him to give me a violent shove back, this nearly caused me to fall but I caught myself in time and swung at him myself knocking him square in the jaw. This time he stumbled and came up rubbing the red lump appearing on his face and gave me a hard punch in the stomach, which momentarily winded me. Some of the market traders ran over to break us up and I saw Katniss coming over. She hadn't seen me yet so I gave Gale a final grin and left.

I left but still heard Katniss ask what had happened to his face and I grinned even more when he replied a curt, "nothing." Still rubbing at his injury that I had given him. Thank you 10kg flour sacks!

"Gale sure makes her happy." The familiar voice of Madge Undersee, the daughter of District 12's mayor, had broken my trail of thought and I turned to see her smiling at me. We were good friends and at one point she had wanting to take it further but I didn't want to be in a relationship if I was in love with someone else so we had just stayed as friends.

"I wish I could make her smile like that." I had sighed but suddenly realizing that I had confessed something secret, I panicked. "Um, I meant to make anyone smile…like that" I stumbled over my words and Madge had looked at me in an odd way and finally said: "Oh come on Peeta, even if she can't see it everyone knows you are a really sweet and funny guy. Have you ever told _dear_ Katniss a joke or did you just resort to small talk"

I didn't fail to notice the slight note of jealousy in that.

She was right I would never make her smile like that besides my jokes were probably awful.

She suddenly seemed to have noticed my gloomy face and had made sure to quickly add, "Well, maybe you just haven't proven to her just how great you are. Do something nice for her, something that you are good at that and she will like"

I had already given some thought to this ever since the incident at the Hob, but what could I do? I wasn't a good hunter like Gale. I couldn't give her any game.

"What do you suggest then since your such an expert on pleasing girls?" She rolled her eyes and had given me a warm grin and then a nudge as she looked like an idea had struck her.

"How about a picture? You are by far the best artist around. Or you could, I don't know, bake her a cake or something."

She had started to walk away then but stopped and added:

"Whatever you do, do it fast Peeta. You can practically hear the screams of their sexual tension" With that she laughed then walked away from me towards her other friends. Maybe she was right? But she had definitely been wrong about Gale's sexual tension!

A picture would've been a nice thought but it would have been unpractical as decorative items were often ruined with the black coal dust that surrounded the Seam. Cakes were too expensive to make as sugar was difficult to come by then, but bread was a good idea I thought to myself. It would be the first time she had my bread, well actually the second time counting the loaves from a few years ago.

It had been a pretty good thought and I didn't know why I hadn't thought of it earlier and now seemed a good time as any to cheer her up so I had decided then and there to bake her a special roll of bread but I hadn't forgotten what tomorrow was and the more people I could make happy before two o'clock the better. Tomorrow was the Reaping of the 74th annual Hunger Games.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author Note: Warning: this story may be longer than I originally thought but it's not a bad thing, as I don't like rushing my stories. Right guys I am changing tenses a little bit because it's getting hard to write and a bit tense …! Less than 24 hours and I've already received well over 150 hits! Thanks guys it's nearly as motivating as reviews are (*wink, wink, nudge, nudge). The story is now over 6000 words long so I can finally become a Beta reader. Anyway I have no more chapters pre-written after this but I will try to write at least another one more by this Friday BUT if I get some reviews or PM's then I may consider uploading it before Wednesday for you. Enjoy and Review.**

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing that is the Hunger Games except for this story.**_

Chapter 5

There was no school or work today. Everyone in District 12 from the Merchants section to the Seam were all silent, house shutters were shut and the odd few people walking by were quiet and ominous, praying that today and the forthcoming events would come and go quickly. To take my mind off of what would happen soon I turned my mind back to the bread, how would I give it to Katniss?

Yesterday when I was back home at the bakery I had told my dad about how I planned on giving her a bread roll and thankfully he smiled and told me to bake away. Pa was always a kind one and thank goodness Ma wasn't around, as she would have 'kindly' reminded that Katniss was an ill breed and that I should focus my attention on Madge. Not going to happen, Ma.

I had gotten out all the ingredients I would need plus one special one. Katniss, you could eat the roots and it tasted rather like a sweet potato only much more herb-like. After kneading my experiment dough and neatly rounding it into a roll shape I watched my creation rise in the oven and the smell was fantastic!

All that I wanted was to do something for her that she would like and I'm sure Gale could never cook like I do. I kept that thought in mind even though Ma had told me that it's usually the women who cook because the men are hard at work.

We don't often get butterflies in our district but right then I felt like every single one of them was fluttering in my stomach and I'm not sure I liked the feeling. It was too late to run and give the bread to her now as I had to work at the storefront soon so I got it out the oven and put it away to cool quickly before she went hunting.

I was just about to walk out the kitchen to the back door to put out the rubbish when the customer bell rang. I turned round to the storefront to see none other than Gale holding a dead squirrel. He nodded at me and spoke:

"Hello Baker boy is your pa in? I have a proposal." His flashy grin annoyed me so I couldn't help retorting " To the squirrel?" The idea of the infamous Gale Hawthorne marrying a squirrel was enough to cheer me up on this bleak day.

But to my surprise he actually laughed too. "Ha-ha, but seriously, I want to trade it for bread and your father said he could cut me a deal here." It was true; pa had said Gale would come and he had left a roll out ready. An idea crossed my mind.

"How about I make a deal with you." I paused contemplating my next words. "I will give you your bread if you pass it in to Katniss mentioning me." I swapped my fathers roll for my own and passed it onto Gale.

"This is bigger than the other one!" He sounded surprised so I added,

"I made it for Katniss but I'm um … too busy right now to give it to her myself" Oh great excuse Peeta, I thought to myself looking around at the empty bakery. "Just tell her it was from me, ok?"

Gale just stood there holding the bread but finally smiled. "Your actually not as bad as I thought you were." He mused, speaking more to himself than to me.

"Just make sure she gets it ok." I really didn't have time for Gale right now as the clock showed only a few hours left until it began.

" Ok, will do bakerb… Peeta" Gale and I nodded and he turned and left undoubtedly off hunting with Katniss in the woods.

I felt that familiar emptiness. Should I have given her the bread myself? I was reminded of the last time I had given her bread when I was wondering about the same thing. Would Gale actually give it to her? If he did would he make any mention that it was from me? But my thoughts were cut of as the clock struck twelve o'clock, only two hours until the reaping began.

It's a good thing I was already wearing my best cotton shirt and my fathers old neat trousers as I had to help everyone else get ready. I made on last attempt at taming my hair with a special 'hair gel' from the capitol, a birthday present from Madge, to go help Sam get ready in my old reaping outfit, once my older brother's. He looked just as nervous as I felt so I gave him a hug and let him finish up. I quickly stuffed a letter in my pocket and left my room.

When everyone was ready, I joined my family in the short walk to the small town square. Attendance to the ceremony was compulsory unless you have a death wish but even those on their dying bed would be put down.

I held my youngest brother Sam's hand, as it was his first Hunger Games as a potential tribute, he was nervous and quiet but I smiled at him to try and ease his mind, after all his name was only entered once.

I looked around at the unrecognizable square. The shop fronts were bright and the cobblestone paving had been swept of the usual coal dust and everything looked neat and clean for once. To add to it all, banners and camera crew were practically buzzing everywhere trying to see which one of the many faces would be one of this years 'lucky' tributes.

People were herded to sign in by officials in an orderly fashion in the different age group categories.

That's another thing: the Reaping is also a great method of keeping tabs on the population.

My brothers and I, as well as all the other twelve-to eighteen-year-olds, were directed to roped off areas marked by ages, the oldest at the front and the young ones like Sam at the back as well as Prim, Katniss' sister. They probably set us out like this as most of the older teenagers would have signed up for grain and oil each year and would have a great deal more slips in the bowl than the younger ones.

Ma and Pa as well as all the other older family members were told to line up around the perimeter, all holding each other's hands and whispering positive words to each other.

I was disgusted to see the betters already placing wagers on who the tributes would be and if they would weep and beg to be spared. Last year both our tributes were young and were killed off within the first few days of entering the arena and who knows what will happen this year.

I stood in the sixteen-year-old boys section next to two boys I recognized from school but I didn't know their names, no one ever knew the tributes name, at least not until after. We exchange glances and brief nods before I turned my attention to the makeshift stage set up just before the justice building. On the stage were three chairs, a podium and the two large glass balls that reminded me of fish tanks just with paper and no fish.

I stared at the boys bowl on the right side. I tried to imagine which of the many slips of fate had my names neatly inked on them.

My eldest brother and I had agreed that if Sam was chosen then he would volunteer and I would take his place as eldest son and look after the bakery and our family.

But I didn't want to think about that, we would wait for the tributes to be reaped, celebrate that we were not chosen then return to our normal lives,

I had even decided that I would give Katniss a note I had been carefully writing for a long time now, expressing my feelings even though I didn't expect her to feel the same about me. Right then the note was in my pocket neatly folded and waiting until the right moment after the Reaping.

Then two of the three chairs were filled with Madge's father, Mayor Undersee, a tall balding man with a short nose just like Madge had, and Effie 'the effing' Trinket. My friends and I call her this because she is just another thing, just more property of the Capitol. She was obviously wearing a wig, a disgusting pink thing, and her scary white grin and spring green suit, neither of which were in her favor but then again, the odds of her ever looking normal were practically non existent. Every year she wore her Capitol trash making everyone else look dull against her bright clash of colors. Effie and the Mayor were then murmuring and looking with concern at the other vacant seat.

Just then the gathered crowd fell silent as the clock stroke two, marking the start of the Reaping. Mayor Undersee stepped forward to the podium, unfortunately he was the opposite character of Madge as where she was bright and fun he was rather boring and expressionless.

He begin to read his long speech in his monotonous voice that hasn't changed since I can remember but I am always interested in the history of Panem, the country that rose out of the ashes of a place once known as 'North America'.

I was horrified when he listed all the disasters, the storms, droughts, fires, and the encroaching seas that swallowed up masses of land. But the worst was the brutal war that split our faith and humanity and killed so many as a consequence.

Thankfully the Mayor didn't go into as much gory detail as we had done previously in our history lessons. The outcome of it all was Panem, the commanding Capitol in the centre of thirteen individual districts, where peace was restored and the flame of a new beginning was lit.

That was until the Dark Days came, the Capitol had too much power over Panem and this led to the all the districts trying to rebel against them, mostly led by District thirteen. Of all the districts, twelve were defeated and the thirteenth destroyed by the one who gave it life.

The Mayor then described the Treaty of Treason and how, as a yearly reminder that the Dark Days must never be repeated, the Hunger Games were created. It seems unfair to me that we must suffer the consequences of our ancestors' actions when we were suffering enough from starvation and the poor conditions we were being left to survive in.

For this the blame rests purely on the Capitol and not the past, what is the point of the Hunger Games? What is the point when we are already so hungry without the Capitols cruel games.

Last week I had to tell Sam exactly what the Hunger Games were. I will now explain to you if you are unaware. The rules are simple, as a reminder of the capitols punishment, each of the twelve districts are forced to 'reap' a boy and a girl tribute to participate. All twenty-four tributes are taken to a large arena, which serves as their prison until the fight to the death ends with one victor.

The arena can be anything, I recall it once being ruined remains of a city and the tributes used building rubble to smash each other apart. This part was left out in my description to Sam. Not only do we watch our friends and strangers die but we have to celebrate as well. The Capitol makes us turn the monstrous event into a public holiday, much like your Christmas only the presents are watching people murder each other and perish under the hands of the all mighty.

The victor wins a life of luxury bringing food and resources back to their district all year leaving us starving and at least two less people in our dwindling population.

I directed my attention back to the stage in time to hear the Mayor's closing sentence. Before joining in on the erupting laughter from the crowd at Haymitch Abernathy, our very much alive, very much drunk victor who staggered around the stage before plunking himself in the third chair with a confused look on his face as the crowd applauded again this time at his failed attempt to hug Effie. The Mayor gave Haymitch a furious glare before introducing Effie. Just then the crowd became silent knowing what came next was no joke, it was time to select the next tributes of District Twelve.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author Note: Here it is, the promised chapter! Sorry that I cut the last one so short but I hope this one will make up for it. Also I know that Peeta actually has two older brothers but I wanted to make one younger because it worked in better with my plot.**

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing that is the Hunger Games except for this story.**_

Chapter 6

Effie replaced the mayor at the podium, trotting up in her ridiculous heeled shoes and shrieked out her signature phrase: "Happy Hunger games! And may the odds be _ever_ in you favour!" Boy I was sick of hearing that. Her wig was off centre when she began her own speech, rambling on about how delighted she is to work with us. She's lying though, my Pa told me that everybody knew she wanted nothing more than to be promoted to a district that actually had a chance of success.

Ignoring her speech, I turned to try and locate Katniss. Funny how even amongst such a large crowd I was quickly drawn to her. I turned to see her fully but she was looking at Gale who was a couple rows in front of me. She looked more distraught than usual and I noticed how Gale hastily turned away and how she quickly re-focused her attention back on Effie.

I wondered what she was thinking right then and how she felt about Prim being eligible for selection. I knew exactly how it felt; it was the same with Sam so in my mind I told her to hold on. It would all be ok and tomorrow would be a brighter day but first we had to make it through today and everyone was holding their breath as Effie stepped up to the bowl for girl tributes and reached towards it.

"Ladies first!" She spoke with a plastered smile on her face and reached into the huge bowl that must have contained thousands of entries. My only thoughts were, oh god please not Katniss or Madge and as Effie pulled out a single slip, it seemed that my prayers had been answered, only it happened to be the one person who was closest to Katniss.

"Primrose Everdeen."

I guess you really did have to be careful with what you wish for and everyone murmured in disgust like they did every time a twelve-year-old was reaped. It seemed the entire audience's gaze was either set on the defiant Prim, who had started walking up to the stage, or the shock-ridden face of Katniss.

She wasn't selected as tribute but I felt no relief, this was going to be a tough year and I was worried about what loosing Prim would do to her. She would need a lot more than me to help her with that!

The crowd had started to settle down once more but to my horror I saw Katniss push to the front shouting out a strangled cry. "Prim!" I don't move as I watch her stumble through the path forming between the other kids. "Prim!" I hear her shout again as she gets closer to the front. This couldn't be good, I could tell her next actions were a bad idea but somehow I could relate to her. After all if it were Sam, even though it was my older brother's wish, I would volunteer. Wait, had I just said volunteer?

I glanced back terror-struck at Katniss dreading her next words hoping with everything inside of me that she wouldn't say…

"I volunteer, I volunteer as tribute!"

My heart wrenched painfully inside of my chest. Distorted images of her with a sword through her chest or her starving or freezing to death in the arena clouded my head. Part of me wanted to run up there and pull her back to me but the realistic part of me told me to let her go, I did just say it was what I would do had I been in her place. Anyways it was all done now; there would be no going back for her. I just hoped that she would stick it out.

Katniss, who seemed to compose herself a little better, walked in front of Prim before joining a beckoning Effie up on the stage. Effie then spoke to the mayor who spoke back giving katniss a pained look. It must have taken them by shock as volunteering was uncommon in most districts and unheard of in District 12, it was practically an early death wish. That thought then combined with Katniss made me so sick inside that I had actually begun to feel physically unwell.

I turned away slightly when Prim begun to shout in desperation at her and Katniss defiantly shouting back, holding back her own tears. Gale walked up said something quietly to her before carrying prim away and returning to the crowd.

Effie tried to resume the ceremony and move on from the drama. "Well, bravo!" She gushed. "That's the spirit of the games, what's your name?" She turned her attention back to Katniss who then strongly told Effie and all the cameras her name.

My pa taught me all about how to treat others but I wanted to punch Effie as she asked her about 'stealing the glory'. And when she had announced Katniss as this year's female tribute nobody clapped or cheered. Instead a couple adults, who knew Katniss from the Hob, held their hands up in a gesture used as thanks or rather it meant saying good-bye to someone you loved. For this reason I also held up my hand for her, always for her.

Haymitch stumbled up in a drunken manner and started saying unintelligible things to Katniss and addressed the cameras before the mayor hoisted him up and sat him down again, this time further near the back where he shortly became unconscious. Again, Effie tried to resume the reaping murmuring a falsely cheery: "What an exciting day!' I saw her discreetly attempting to straighten her wig that had tilted severely right among all the chaos.

"But more excitement to come! It's time to choose our male tribute!"

Honestly at that moment in time I felt too shaken after Katniss' reaping to even think about my brothers or friends' safety before Effie quickly stuffed her hand in the bowl and pulled out the first slip she got her hands on before trotting back up to the microphone and announcing the name of this years male tribute. I didn't even notice until heads and cameras turned my way, that the name she had just called out as tribute:

Was me.

Suddenly everyone had his or her eyes on me and I caught Katniss' gaze on stage. I lingered there for a small moment just staring at her before one of the boys behind me gave me a small shove forward.

I hear a cry from my family and as I walked forward I glanced back at my town, my friends and my family and I think of home and as the mayor reads out the Treaty of Treason, I knew then that this would probably be the last time I saw them all.

While the mayor was continuing his reading, I started to accept my fate in my mind. Even if I couldn't fight or wield a weapon maybe I could help Katniss to win after all at least I'm one less tribute for her to worry about. I started to form some sort of plan just as the mayor asked the two tributes to shake hands.

I reached out and took her soft hand that sent warmth through me. I looked into her grey eyes and saw the fear and anxiety that would never show on her face. I squeezed her hand gently to tell her that I understood how she felt. I wanted to pull her into a hug then and there but we let go and broke eye contact as she looked back to the crowd.

I did too; my Pa and brothers' faces all had the same expression of sadness and remorse while my Ma just looked as sour as always not even showing pride that her 'useless' son had done something foe once. I wanted to run away but I was in it for Katniss now whether I liked it not besides I would be executed if I ran so why not die protecting the one I love.

The games had begun and I would have to play my part well if Katniss was to win.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author Note: Just to say that right now I'm not all that sure how far I am going to continue this. I don't know if it should go all the way to the end. What are your thoughts on that? I went back to school today and judging by the amount of work I predict my not-so-understanding teachers will give me, my posts might take a little longer but do not fear! I will post at LEAST one a week.**

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing to do with the hunger games except certain plots in this story.**_

Chapter 7

I had been standing alone in this big room for a while now and the emptiness was starting to unsettle me. Just as soon as the ceremony had ended the peacekeepers had whisked us off into the Justice building to say our goodbyes before we left. Of course I had already tried to leave but there were two men guarding the room stopping people from entering but more importantly, stopping me from leaving so I guessed that all I could do at this point was wait for someone to tell me what would happen next.

I knew what would be happening next. Katniss and I would be taken by train to the Capitol, trained in combat and survival skills, enter the arena, I would do all it took to make sure she survived and then I would die. I shakily sat down in one of the few chairs in the room, what was I thinking? And how the hell was I taking this so well?

I had pretty much just planned my death and even though I would never show it, that scared the crap out of me. I had barely been reaped ten minutes ago and I was already turning into someone I wasn't. 'Do all it took to make sure she survived' that would almost certainly mean killing the other tributes.

No, it meant _murdering_ them.

I ran my sweating hands over my face and through my hair fighting my own emotions before balling my fist and standing up to face what was going to happen. I am not going to be a murderer; the Capitol is the one forcing us into this situation so every death would be another blood stain on their hands NOT mine. I thought about what it meant to take a life but then I decided that I would only kill if the tributes were posing a serious threat to Katniss or myself.

Starting to crumble inside, I aimlessly paced around the room and let out a laugh like a complete maniac. Nothing was really funny, unless it was funny that at the age of sixteen, I was already contemplating killing, my own death and how in five seconds of being drawn from a bowl the Capitol had just taken away the future I so longed to have with the girl who I was supposed to fight in a competition. A competition where the only prize was being given back your rights to stay alive, and then to try and live with everything that had happened in the games. And of course by then, it would probably be safe to say that you would no longer be you. I mean just look at Haymitch, he can barely face staying sober so he spends all his time with a bottle in his hand!

I knelt on the floor trying to calm myself with deep breaths but I still felt the unshed tears in my eyes and it took all the strength I had in me right then and there to not break down and cry. I would stay strong and at least try and make it to the train without turning into an emotional wreck!

With all the thought spinning through my mind I hadn't realised that I had dropped something and as soon as I had looked down and noticed my letter being crumpled under my boot I quickly snatched it up and stuffed it back in my pocket. What was I going to do with it now that we were both in the games?

But all my thoughts of the letter suddenly vacated my mind as I heard familiar shouts and the door slammed open revealing my family. Pa and Sam already looked like they had been crying and everyone, except for Ma, pulled me into a tight hug one by one each wanting to hold on until the very last second.

"Oh, son…" Pa's voice broke as he pulled me into yet another hug, which said more to me than any words could.

Both of my brothers stared at me obviously heartbroken. I turned to the eldest and most calm of the two and smiled at him, trying to say that it would be all right. I was about to speak when he interrupted me.

"I should have volunteered for you, Peeta I'm so sorry, I don't know why I didn't say anything." I could tell by the way he had screwed his face up that he had been giving himself a hard time ever since.

"No you shouldn't have." I said matter-of-factly. "You're the eldest, we need you at the bakery and to take care of Sammy here." I ruffled Sam's hair. "Besides I need to be there for her."

"Don't be so stupid boy! It's obvious that this year District 12 will have a victor." Even after years of abuse from her, Ma's final words to me hurt more than any beating or shouting had ever done. It cut into me deep, this was my own mother and she had absolutely no belief in me. She didn't even think me worthy enough to help Katniss.

"Honestly Agatha, this is your son and this might be the last time… You … or the last time we…. why can't you show some damn compassion at a time like this!"

Ma turned away and muttered a curt goodbye to me and walked out. Everyone fell silent again until Sam stepped towards me.

"Don't listen to that cow Peeta." We all laughed at his appropriate choice of wording.

"I could think of a lot worse than that." Muttered my elder brother darkly before he hugged me again, said his farewells and good lucks and left.

"I mean it Peeta." Sam continued. " Ignore what she said, you are the bravest, strongest and nicest person I have ever met even if you are all mushy and gross when you go on about 'your crush'! You will win and come home and we can be a family again. And by the way I am taking your room until you get back." He added the last bit before smirking cheekily at me.

"Make us proud son." And just like that they were all gone and I was left alone again. But this time I felt stronger because I knew that, by his last words to me, Pa had meant for me to do the right thing whether it meant winning or not even though I was still unsure over what 'the right thing' was.

By now Katniss would have also had a visit from her family and probably _Gale_ too and I wondered how she was feeling and I hoped she was coping better than I was, for both our sakes.

The two peacekeepers, who had both been guarding my door, told me to follow them to a car waiting just outside. I looked around anxiously for her but another car had just left and I presumed that she was in it. So composing myself again, I got in the car and started the short journey from the Justice building to the station.

This was it, I took in the passing scenery of home trying to remember each tree and coal pile but it all turned into a blur. Strange how once before I had only thought my surroundings to be ugly and dire but now as I was being forced to leave it all behind, it looked calm and the afternoon light from the sun cast a golden haze over the once shadowed beauty. This was when the tears spilled from my eyes, the reason: I had tried to memorise the surrounding was because not only was this the last time I would be here at home but also when I was thrown into the arena, I wanted to remember who I was and were I came from. Never forgetting that I am Peeta Mellark, the baker's son from District 12.

As the car approached its destination, I saw Katniss looking almost bored, but I knew that she was just trying to appear strong for the masses of cameras and reporters that surrounded her.

I wiped the tears off of my face quickly before stepping out into the flashing of lights and the screaming reporters who all wanted an interview with the red and puffy eyed male tribute of District 12.

At that moment I didn't care whether I looked weak or not, I simply walked through the crowd and stepped aboard only lingering in the doorway for some last minute pictures before the doors were slammed shut and the train began to move at once, starting the long journey to the Capitol and bringing us ever closer to our awaiting fate.


	8. Chapter 8

**Author Note: My apologies for taking so long to write this but I had various school related obstacles in the way of my Fan fiction time but no more excuses! This fic is rated a T mostly because of the **_**occasional**_** crude language so don't say I didn't warn you but I promise that it is nothing that the character wouldn't have said! Anyways… I added in some more at the last-minute as a form of an apology.**

**P.S:**

**My dear reviewer: Yaminoryu Nogadian, you are so right in respect that years of baby modeling really have boosted my confidence to write a good story and I'm glad that you recognize both of my unique talents (you may determine whether or not that was sarcastic! ;])!**

**Hope this was worth the wait for you all. Read and review for a massive thank you (It rhymes!). **

**disclaimer: I don't own the Hunger Games for if I did then firstly I wouldn't be writing this fic and secondly I would be living somewhere sunny!**

Chapter 8

Stepping into that train was like being transported into a whole other world. The interior alone was probably worth more than 5 years pay and was far more fancy than the Justice building rooms had been. The bright colours and shiny polished furniture was starting to give me a headache and I had the odd sensation that I was being watched. I glanced over to see Katniss but she was quickly whisked away by Effie to her temporary room further down the long train. For a short while I just stood there, not wanting to sit on one of the pristine couches or uncomfortable looking seats, so in the end I started fiddling with the various items on a nearby countertop. I picked up a small bird ornament, which was surprisingly rather heavy for its size. I examined it closer and realized that in the place of eyes it had two lenses? A camera! So I was right about being watched! I carefully placed the fake ornament in a drawer so that it would be useless but something told me that this wasn't the only camera set to watch us. I suddenly felt a lot more aware of my surroundings as I looked around closely for another disguised lens among the décor.

"Ehem..." Suddenly Effie cleared her throat from behind me, causing me to jump slightly. "What are you doing?" I then realized I was in the unfortunate position of bending over forwards so I could examine the chair legs. "I was just … um … admiring the woodcraft of these chairs!" But I mentally smacked myself as Effie told me that the chairs were made from some Capitol material called 'plastic' and I gingerly followed her in silence, further into the seamlessly never-ending carriages towards my room. As I progressed further through the train I thought to myself just how wide it actually was compared to how it looked on the exterior. I sure hated the Capitol but I had to admit that their technology was far more impressive and advanced than I could ever have imagined.

As we hurtled at an impossibly fast speed across Panem, I could only marvel at how efficient this was compared to walking or driving in one of the few motorcars that belonged to the mayor and our head peacekeeper. To be honest, it was actually quite exciting. But I soon reminded myself that although this was my first time on a train it would also be my last. In less than 24 hours, we would arrive at the centre of all this mess, the Capitol.

Effie left me to 'unpack' and trotted away back towards the main compartments, probably to try to sober up Haymitch before dinner in an hour. I was pretty sure what to expect from my room and I was right. I swung open the doors to reveal a large room with an en suite bathroom. Like the rest of the train everything was neat and pristine so for good measure I ruffled the sheets on the bed and threw the cushions off of my armchair. More homely already! I didn't see why Effie had told me to unpack, as I had no luggage or personal items except for the clothes I had on and the letter. There were so many confusing and dire thoughts running through my head that I found myself wanting a shower to help calm me down. The calm feeling of being surrounded by water was one that I longed for to help clear my head and to take the edge off of what was coming. Big mistake. I stripped off my reaping clothes and stepped into the spacious bathroom and I immediately noticed the massive shower in the middle of the room with a very confusing array of buttons, switches and all sorts of controls that I started to dread touching.

Back in my home in 12, we were lucky enough to have a shower but nothing as fancy as this. It was only a simple shower head connected to the bath but it always had leaks and hot water was never reliable so it was mostly ice-cold. Also, it had only ever let off a small drizzle of water, but when I turned the largest button to start the shower I yelped and jumped back as a waterfall-like jet of water suddenly plummeted down and hit me. The water was slowly heating up so I desperately jammed a few close buttons and ended up being squirted all over with various soaps and gels leaving me smelling like a sickly mix of vanilla, jasmine and orange. If I thought that wasn't bad enough, as I stumbled due some of the soap that had fired at my eyes, I had pressed another damn button! I cowered back shielding my face, expecting more disgusting gels to shoot at me but what I got was far worse! Once the shallow pool of scented water had drained from the shower floor, some panels then slid back to reveal large fans, which I instantly knew meant bad news.

I was blasted with endless stormy currents of both hot and cold air from all sides and I could literally feel my skin rippling under the sheer force and as I frantically searched for the off-switch, I prayed that there were no cameras in here and my embarrassing first Capitol shower wasn't being broadcasted live on television. After a few more desperate minutes of frantic button jamming, I walked stiffly out of the bathroom dry and with a new note to never use Capitol showers again!

I looked down on my reaping clothes, they seemed too out-of-place here and my discovery of a camera earlier meant that the Capitol would probably be watching my every move and if I wanted to get sponsors then I would have to look the part. Back in my room, there was a giant wardrobe and I was momentarily glad to see it stocked with clothes but then I actually took another second to look a bit closer and suddenly my reaping clothes didn't seem so bad. I frowned as I tried on yet another low-drooping tee-shirt but a glance at the clock told me to just put up with looking like a complete ponce for the time being and who knew, maybe the Capitol would like seeing a bit of chest. I thought of how my brothers would be laughing when they saw me in a girl's top and maybe it was good to give them something to smile about.

My skin was still tingling from the soaps and I didn't dare touch any of the bottled aftershave on my table so I slipped on that hideous top and a pair of trousers and left my room for dinner. I contemplated visiting Katniss to see if she was having a hard time and to inform her about the cameras but I decided against it. Don't get me wrong, I did want to see her but something told me that we both needed time alone to think. That as well as avoiding the awkwardness of me walking in on her if she was showering!

I also realized that I had forgotten which way to go. After reaching a dead-end with my memories, I decided to try left. I walked past more bedrooms until I finally caught a glimpse of the familiar gold chandeliers from the main carriage. As I stepped through the remaining compartment, I banged into a wall. The wall reached out an arm and held me steady then pushed me back and I looked up confused to see the humored face of Haymitch.

"What brings you to the bar? Didn't think you could stomach real mens drink…" He spoke with a heavy slur and let out a loud hiccup before continuing. " You know, the only thing the Capitol has ever done right is make this god-damned drink. Why are you lookin' at me like that!? You should try some, Peeta, loosen up a bit!"

We hadn't even begun dinner yet and he was already drunk, I didn't have the patience to deal with him right then so I grabbed the drink from his hands and poured him a healthy glass of water from the bar tap. I grumbled at him about thanking me later and dragged his sorry self through to the dining table with me.

"You know what, I think I'm just gonna go and lie down." And with that he stumbled away, most likely back to his room leaving me alone in my uncomfortably stiff chair at the empty table. The dishes in front of me looked too fragile and pristine to touch so I ended up twiddling my thumbs waiting for the rest of our little group to join me.

Thankfully for my sake, I didn't have to wait long. Effie bustled in through the door with Katniss and they took the seats opposite from my own. It looked like she had a Capitol wardrobe too as she was in a dark green silk shirt that complimented her soft olive skin. They both glanced towards the empty chair next to me.

"He went to take a nap." I answered their unspoken question and Effie nodded with a frown. "Well, it's been an exhausting day." Effie sounded almost relieved about Haymitch's absence. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Katniss taking in my outfit and I smirked at her. "Interesting fashion here, eh?" I smiled but she quickly averted her eyes down at the table. Oh well, so much for making conversation then! I turned to Effie, "Seriously though, half of my wardrobe looks like it should belong in hers."

Katniss, still focused down on the table, mirrored my smirk but our escort was not amused and Effie chose to ignore my statement completely.

An uncomfortable silence filled the room once more and I chose to examine my spoon, although I quickly stopped when our first course arrived. It was the most food I had ever had in one sitting! Firstly we had a thick carrot soup, green salad, lamb chops and mashed potatoes, cheese and fruit all topped with a delicious chocolate cake. I tried to resist shoving everything in my mouth at once and I could see my fellow tribute was fighting that urge as well. Luckily my dad had taught me table manners in my early years and I knew that Katniss' ma had grown up in the Merchants sector as well, meaning she would have taught her daughters.

I stopped eating and paused at the lamb, why was I sat there pretending not to be so hungry when I was? Even for my family food was certainly not plentiful and there was enough food on this menu to see us through for at least a week. On the other hand The Everdeen family probably had never had this much food in a month put together so it would last them weeks. And I thought: here I am sitting like I've got a stick up my ass not being grateful for something that almost the entire of District 12 is in desperate need of! Thank god those thoughts were only in my head because if I had said them aloud then someone would have hit me for crude language in the company of _ladies. _

Effie crossed the line when she commented on how well mannered we were compared to the last, undoubtedly starving, tributes from last year. If I was upset, Katniss was fuming; we both put down our cutlery and exchanged knowing glances both thinking the same thing. I had the same thoughts as before but this time I didn't keep them all in my head, "My ass!" I slammed my fists down and stood up. All eyes burned into me as I said it and I brought said ass and my plate of food away from the table and back to my room. I needed some time to think and I needed to be alone.

By some miracle I managed to storm the right way back to my room and I shoved the plate on the side as I sank to the floor scrunching up my fists in my hair in utter frustration. What frustrated me so was the fact that all that food was wasted on me. I wouldn't even be alive soon because of the stupid games and yet back at home there were kids and families that wouldn't be alive soon due to starvation. I stood up and began pacing the room frantically. But it didn't help as everything I saw angered me more. I looked at the luxurious décor, the value of all the furniture together could probably set a dozen or so families up comfortably for life, saving them from starvation, from the bitter cold of winter and from the sweating heats of summer but yet the money that could save them went towards these rooms that are only used two days a year!

Caught ablaze in the fires of my anger I picked up the nearest piece of furniture, that happened to be a solid mahogany side table, and chucked it against a wall causing a pleasing crash of splintering wood and causing a large crack and a mess of chipped plaster and dust from the wall. I stood there taking large breaths in order to calm myself and through it all, I hadn't realized that he had been standing behind me and watching my little moment the whole time.

"I'm impressed, you're stronger than you look. You're going to need that strength in the games if you want to stand a chance."

I spun round to see a now-sober Haymitch, who leant casually against my door frame as if nothing out of the ordinary had occurred. I stood staring at him for a while wondering who else had seen my display of physical strength and emotional weakness. The whole of Panem had probably already starting spreading wild rumors about 'Peeta the mental'. Haymitch obviously didn't want to stay and chat as he stood up straight and said: "Time to watch the other reapings, trust me when I say that you will need to learn about the rest of your competition." And with that he left not waiting for me to follow.

I had still been too caught up in my own head to move. What was happening to me? I could already feel the Capitol shape me into something that I was not. I wouldn't let them turn me into a monster like so many before. And what had Haymitch meant by 'the rest of your competition'? I was not in it to battle Katniss but to aid her unless he knew something that he wasn't telling me.

I cast aside those thoughts for the time being as I walked slowly back to the main carriage to watch the reaping. Amongst all the rest of his crap, Haymitch was right about one thing: I needed to learn as much as I could about who I would be fighting against and something told me that the odds hadn't been in my favor with the brutality of my opponents. But the only thing I could do was watch and learn.

Watch and stare into the televised eyes trying to work out who would be the one to bring my downfall.


End file.
